California or Bust

You can rest your weary head on my soft bed

You’ve been running in the dark and left for dead

In a town like this they’ll spit you out and blow a kiss

No matter where you aim you’re sure to miss

Searching for something, can’t be bought or sold

Planning and scheming, how they’ll scam you

When you’re panning for gold

In the hills where beauty hides a dream backslides

Her mirror’s growing old, she’s bought fool’s gold

Searching for something …

When the earthquake settles down … exposed ghost town

Though is seems your heart is broke it just awoke

Back at the starting line -- known for the first time

Trick of mirrors and of smoke -- you missed the joke!

Searching for something …

The mountains understand why I sleep on desert sand

Nothing’s as it seems, betrayed inside my dreams

I came to pan for gold but my soul was bought not sold

Ghost towns list my name on dusty walks of fame

And I feel like I’m falling …

Afloat in endless blue, my past a fading view

Don’t say they didn’t warn you

Say farewell to California

I’ve learnt to sail ‘round rocks, my key has tumbled different locks

Watched the seabirds dive and fly, it looks so simple but I just can’t say goodbye

So I stood alone, another heart without a home

Too proud to stay I’d run to where hearts hung from palm trees

Drying in the sun

Afloat in endless blue …

On my small isle we respect the sea, chained to the land straining to be free

So we’re burning the fields and watching the sky, searching for how and why

But Rachel I regret and I will not forget

Such simple grace and charm

Now I feel like I’m falling and ignoring the alarm …

Afloat in endless blue …

I hear there’s a mystery at the heart of the hive

Can we learn from our history, keep the honey alive?

Every heart must learn to take a little pain

To forgive the sting that love can bring not ask it to explain

If bees make honey and we help them to

Then it’s not funny when they turn on you

A lie for a lie and a truth for a truth

When we make honey then that’s the proof

In the heart of the winter, feeling nothing anymore

The heart’s shut down, can’t even find the door

Picking Lilly of the Valley, when springtime starts to thaw

It smells so sweet on Easy Street I’m coming back for more!

If bees make honey …

If there’s something that can help us survive remember love’s always alive

If even Lazarus can come back again then I say "Amen!"

If bees make honey …

The clouds pulled away as the train pulled out of the station that morning you left

Jan caught my eye as I looked at the sky, I looked more amused than bereft

It’s amazing we managed to keep things together without your strong views as cement

But Jan said we’re starting to use our own minds and I’m starting to know what she meant

Pete said you suffered from all that attention but you thought you suffered for art

And who’s to say if you get your own way that you end up alone and apart

But I hear that your house is a wonderful place far away from the maddening crowd

Birdsong in spring is a wonderful thing but I know you don’t like it too loud

So thanks for the letter, we hope that you’re better, not feeling too proud of the pain

The forecast here is continuing clear so Jan says to kiss you,

You know that we miss you like rain

Jan said she’d heard an old friend had left town on the same train that sped you away

A student of art who could break any heart, she suffered attention that way

So pick up the phone if you’re feeling alone when your radiance isn’t so bright

Cause I’ve been where you’re standing and though you’re demanding

Your bark is much worse than your bite

I heard that your show drew the usual crowd and I’m sorry I couldn’t be there

And Jan laughed out loud when she told me she saw them put thin strands of paint in your hair

Then I hung up the phone in a bed all my own cause she said that she’d missed the last train

She’d stay with a friend that she met at the show and she missed him much more than the rain

So thanks for the letter, I hope that you’re better, not feeling too proud of the pain

The forecast here is continuing clear so Jan said she’d kiss you,

And you know that we miss her like rain

I was trying so hard to follow the trail 

with the sun burning brands on my skin

Some will seek it like the Holy Grail but me -- I see it’s a sin

In the canyon where I’m sure that I’m lost wind whispers hope in my ears

Despair is a weight I can take on my back 

but hope is the friend I most fear

Ride on! Into the fading light, ride on through the valley of fear

Ride on! There’s a quiet but righteous voice

with a message I’m straining to hear

Ride on!

There’s blood on my hands and I guess it’s mine; 

they threw me out of so many towns

It’s a wonder I got back in the saddle this time 

looking like a rodeo clown

Ride on!

Sun bleached bones still litter the land 

while mine are still wrapped in thin skin

I had a friend; she gave me a hand … I’ll see if I can trace her again

Ride on! Into the fading light, ride on through the valley of fear

Ride on! There’s a quiet but righteous voice 

with a message I’m straining to hear

Ride on!

Hello! Do you read me over? I know I’m all alone

Desert stretches all around me, I’m lost -- or has it found me?

‘Cause I can’t take it anymore, no I can’t fake it anymore

Memories are taking over, enemies appear as friends

‘Cause I can’t take it anymore, no I can’t fake it anymore

Let go -- nothing can hold you, see the open sky above

Let go, nothing controls you. You dreamt it up

So now just let it go

Shut up! None can hear you anymore

Make up your fading mind

‘Cause I can’t take it anymore, no I can’t fake it anymore

Let go -- nothing can hold you, see the open sky above

Let go, nothing controls you. You dreamt it up

So now just let it go

They came like painted angels dropped from the sky

And sang their twisted lullaby

From my youthful will I joined their proud refrain:

"Forsake that ball and chain -- we won’t be fooled again!"

In their eyes -- reaching for the prize

In their eyes -- no compromise

Shed no tear see no fear in their eyes

The autumn lady changed to winter -- as she will

And left their fragile hearts to chill

Their proudly painted clothes had faded in the rain

They can’t go home again -- there’s no one left to blame

In their eyes …

And now their children feel the same, they feel the anger and the shame

Although you try to stop their pain you see the cycle start again …

In their eyes …

Another still hot day, his car pulls up outside

She stretches like a cat, so sleepy almond-eyed

She offers him a drink, says "Take a look around"

Asks can he use a sink, she won’t be gagged and bound

The palm trees sway on Bella Vista Way

The Santa Ana wind has blown him far from home

He’s found some other lips, she’s just a chaperone

His refuge from his fear is making up the bed

Discarded and alone, she’s lying where she bled

The palm trees sway on Bella Vista Way

Two cops knock at the door, they want to check his plate

"It’s just a routine call, be cool don’t fabricate"

His heart just missed a beat, the ground a little shake

She’s nowhere to be found -- the penny drops too late…

She -- wiped away a tear. She -- gave up hope and fear

Let the past fade away, the future disappear

She -- saw a better way. Dreamed of a brighter day

She had the wings to fly, far away …

In the open sky, fly like a bird

In the open sky, true to her word

I commit her spirit to the open sky

High in a tower of glass and stone, high, feeling so alone

Who from her darkest night could light her way back home?

Dreams of a unicorn, dreams of a crown once worn

Wakes to the dirt and noise, sees hope stillborn

In the open sky …

She always said "Just look up to the magic, see the wonder above!"

But her fall from grace was so long and tragic

She missed the wonder of love …

In the open sky …

West winds are gently blowing

Her ashes finally going home -- the desert sighs …

I sit in sweet surrender, sun baked adobe splendour

White walls frame deep blue skies

The angels' city seems so far away

My golden dreams are sinking like the sun

And at 9 and 20 Palms the day is done

Day dawns the desert wakes

Old habit gently breaks away -- as clouds roll by

No pain, no end, no trying, no time for tears -- stop crying

There’s no time at all

The fiddler breaks a string and gives the game away

One hand claps but the band is on the run

And at 9 and 20 Palms the day is done

Night falls on northern sky

New ways for old as years roll by

New skin -- old bone

And at 9 and 20 Palms …

I’m coming home